This morning when I finally crawled out of bed, I found myself, without even thinking, automatically stripping off the sheets. I marveled that even though I’d consciously decided not to do it, habit was taking over, and within a few minutes the task was done.

I discovered the beauty of systems in the early months after my husband’s death. Most days I just wanted to sleep – but nothing went well the days I gave in to that desire. I knew the children needed me up and functioning, and I knew if I just got the basics covered, the vital things would be taken care of, and life would be better for all of us.

So over time I searched for and adopted systems to cover those tasks – meals, basic housekeeping, laundry, and finances, to start with, and as I learned to be consistent with them, I found that those systems began to function without my having to focus on them. Once they became habit, it was hard not to do them!

As you’re moving through the grief process, if you find things in your home and life collapsing all around you, try implementing some systems. One by one, things will begin to fall into place, peace will reign again, and it will all happen….

without even thinking!

Yours for healing,

Roslyn

When I arrive at her door, she welcomes me with open arms, and invites me to sit on her couch. We visit; she wants to know all about what I’m doing, and to hear about each of the children, and then she invariably leads me into the kitchen where she has something delectable waiting to share with me. Lately, she sits and watches as I eat, instead of joining me. “My waistline, you know,” she says, with a twinkle in her eye.

She has had her share of disappointment and sorrow in her life. She lost a son to cancer, an extremely difficult trial for her.

But through her disappointments, through all the difficulties life has brought her way, she has remained giving and generous, always ready to extend an invitation to ‘come visit.’

Perhaps she knows something we all could learn from. Perhaps she finds healing and comfort in creating a place of peace, and in sharing it. Perhaps the chance to focus on and serve another lifts her heart and, for a few moments, her sorrow is replaced with the joy that comes from lifting another soul.

I believe that is true. I believe there is healing in making our homes places where those who enter (including ourselves) can feel peace. I believe as we find ways to increase our enjoyment in doing so, we will feel more fulfilled, and we will discover a desire to reach out and share that peace with others.

Homemaking (or “Homekeeping” as author Miriam Lukken calls it) is one way we express our love for and serve those who share or visit our homes. Maybe Mrs. Dunwoody’s Excellent Instructions and other similar books can remind us of that scriptural admonition, “when ye are in the service of your fellow men, ye are only in the service of your God.”

And maybe then we will be reminded, once again, that the surest way to peace and healing and happiness in this life is through serving others.