Optimism
Angels Watching Over Me
Friday, August 20th, 2010 | Death of a loved one, Family, Healing after Loss, Healing from grief, Help for Widows, Losing a loved one, The healing power of Faith in Christ, Unshaken Faith in Trials | No Comments
Monday evening we had planned to go to a Marvin Goldstein concert that had been arranged just for widows and widowers and their families. I looked forward to it for months, and could hardly wait to listen to his beautiful music and to hear him tell the story of his life.
Life took a turn, however, on Monday afternoon. We were visiting my sister’s family at a cabin in the mountains above the Salt Lake Valley, and the cousins offered to teach my daughter, Meg, to ride a four-wheeler.
“Have fun – and be ’safety sallies,’” I called as they trooped down the cabin’s front steps. They left, joking and talking, and my sister and I settled down on the couches in the front room for a much-needed nap.
The next thing I heard was my sister’s voice saying, “Is she okay?”, and my nephew’s voice hesitating, “Um….no…”
I awoke to see him carrying Meg into the cabin, obviously injured and in shock.
He laid her on a recliner, my sister grabbed a towel and began tearing it into strips for bandages, and while we continued to assure Meg she would be okay, we began cleaning her wounds.
I began feeling light-headed. I’ve never been good around blood. But I was determined to stay present and to be a help, not a hindrance for Meg at this crucial time, so I sat on the floor as I attempted to wash the gravel out the palm of one of her hands, breathing deeply to keep the faintness away. We decided we’d better get her to emergency care immediately.
It seemed to take forever to drive her over the rocky roads to the nearest help in Park City, but thankfully the waiting room wasn’t too crowded, and soon we were ushered into the triage area.
As the doctors examined Meg, I became more and more relieved. No broken bones; no apparent internal injuries; no concussion – just a painful bump on her nose, a knee needing stitches and arms and hands in need of bandages for her ‘road rash’.
After the doctors made their decision and left the curtained area to get the supplies, Meg and I looked at each other, and I think we were both overcome at the same moment with the thought, “There were angels protecting you.” It was a deeply spiritual moment when we received that thought, and we knew it was true.
Later that night, Meg was lying in her bed resting when one of her cousins that had been riding an ATV behind her came to visit and see how she was doing, and he told me what he had seen from behind.
Meg had been following another cousin, who had turned to go down a hill. Meg turned too sharply, and the ATV lifted up on two wheels, then bounced down on the other two, and then completely flipped and rolled. It ended up right-side up – on top of Meg – who had landed face down in a ditch. The ATV wasn’t even touching her.
I know that for some reason, angels can’t – and don’t – prevent all tragedies. All of us who have lost any loved one are all too aware of that fact. Many of us know people who are para- or quadraplegics after incidents such as Meg’s. We were told Monday about a man whose ATV did the same thing as Meg’s – and he didn’t live.
Why was Meg spared? We may never know – but I can – and forever will express gratitude for those protecting angels, and for the answer to our prayer of that morning, asking for “protection in all that we do this day”.
As we strive to stay near to our Savior, He promises us, “For I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my Spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up.”*
As widows and widowers, and those who have suffered loss, even though our lives have not turned out as we would have hoped, I believe we can see evidence of that Heavenly help, and of those angels, in our daily lives. I believe they help us ward off despair, and whisper hope to our hearts. I believe they give us courage to go out just one more day and face the world. I know they give us strength to face the tragedies life brings our way. And, sometimes, for reasons we may never understand, I believe they perform miracles that help us see that truly, we are not alone on this journey, and that Heaven is only a prayer away.
May you more often see the influence of those angels that are “round about you”, and may you, too, feel to give thanks for that Heavenly help.
With a thankful heart,
Roslyn
*Doctrine and Covenants 84:88
A Slower Pace
Sunday, August 15th, 2010 | Building Self-Confidence, Death of a loved one, Grieving, Healing after Loss, Healing from grief, Help for Widows, Losing a Spouse, Losing a loved one, Loss of a loved one, Overcoming Disappointment, Personal Care while Grieving, Sudden loss, The Power of a Positive Outlook, Unshaken Faith in Trials | No Comments
Richards Hollow Trail, Blacksmith Fork Canyon
For her birthday, my oldest daughter Brooke asked if I would accompany her on a hike, high in the alpine mountains above Hyrum, Utah.
First you have to know that she is more than twenty years younger than I am – and has always had incredible energy and drive. She accomplishes more in a few hours than I do in an entire day.
I love the mountains, and I love her, so I willingly accepted. I did not take into account that, due to my recent schedule, I have not been consistent in my daily exercising (so I am somewhat out of shape), and that hikes usually entail significant uphill trails which can be pretty demanding. I only envisioned the joy of being out in nature with my daughter, and I was excited.
As we headed up the steep rocky trail, it very quickly became apparent that she was setting a pace I was unaccustomed to – and one that I would not be able to hold for very long. The path followed a stream that gurgled over rocks and tree roots, and there was frequent welcome shade where the tall trees’ branches reached over the trail. It was beautiful, and I drew strength from the beauty that surrounded us. But that strength was not quite enough, and after not too long, I guess she perceived I was beginning to ‘lose steam’.
“Let’s rest in this shade…” she graciously offered as we arrived in a cool glade of aspen. Her husband and my youngest daughter were with us, and they seemed almost as relieved as I felt when we stopped to catch our breath.
After a brief rest, we were back on our way. And although I loved being out in all of that breath-taking beauty, I wished I could slow down a bit! The pace demanded too much of my focus just to keep climbing, one step after another.
Brooke thoughtfully stopped us for frequent rests that I know she didn’t need. She still seemed full of energy when, after a few hours, we had hiked through meadows of wildflowers, groves of pines, hillsides of aspen and sheer rock cliffs. We finished the hike and headed down toward the car, filled with a deepened appreciation for the beauties of this world.
But I have decided that I am at a place in life where, although I still love hiking, I now go with a different objective. No longer am I driven to get to the top of the mountain, or the end of the trail, or even to the wonder that the guidebook promises is just around the next bend. I now enjoy a slower pace, and I am prone to halt more frequently to study the rock that, in earlier years, I would have simply stepped over. My eyes are less focused on the montain top and instead are drawn this way and that, eager to study a wildflower that beckons to be smelled, an unusual leaf, or the butterfly that flits from one blossom to the next. I am lifted by their beauty, and I am renewed by being surrounded by God’s abundant creations. I am content to sit and listen to the breeze rustling the tops of the giant pines while others continue the climb to the top of the trail.
I believe that trauma, loss, discouragement and grief require us to slow down and pull back from the frantic pace of daily life, and can even be an invitation to look for the small things that witness to us that God is aware of us and our struggles, and that He desires to lift us with all that He created specifically to bring beauty into our lives, and peace into our hearts.
Of course He knew we would meet with difficulty in this life, and I believe He planned to surround us with things that would give us healing, hope and courage, if we would only open our eyes to them.
So if you are seeking that healing, and if you find sometimes that your hope and courage are failing you, slow down. Don’t let the length of life’s journey discourage you, but rather, focus just on today, and open your eyes and find one of God’s messages of hope – a beautiful view of a mountain, meadow, or lake; the song of a bird outside your window, or the intricate beauty of a flower.
Choose a slower pace – and find hope!
-Roslyn
Help Is All Around Us
Friday, June 18th, 2010 | Building Self-Confidence, Healing after Loss, Healing from grief, Help for Widows, Moving On, Principles of Wealth, The Power of a Positive Outlook | No Comments
“Open your spiritual eyes to the help all around you.”
I had just called in, a few moments late, to a seminar hosted by Heather Madder, and those were the first words I heard her speak. I immediately felt a confirmation that what she was saying was true – that I am not alone, but that there are unseen forces at work helping me.
I am studying to learn about the Internet and how to more effectively market my book and coaching services. I sometimes have thoughts that I am alone, and that it is too difficult, and that I cannot do it. Yet Heather says, “The whole universe exists to support what you want to build,” and tells us that we need to have a clear intention and belief that the answers and help we need will come quickly and easily, and that doors will open to pave our way.
Another thought I have frequently is, “I don’t have time to do all I need to.” Heather teaches that we are constantly scripting our own limitations, and that we need to be aware of thoughts like that, which become ‘programs’ we may be creating in our own lives that are holding us back.
We can change those scripts! I decided tonight as I listened to Heather that my old way of thinking and system of beliefs is not serving me! I am going to take her advice and open my spiritual eyes to the help all around me. I will envision, as she suggested, people all around the world, sitting at computers, making connections to help pave the way for my success. She also suggested there are spiritual beings ready to help us as we request that help.
I believe that. I love the promise in the scriptures:
“I will go before your face. I will be on your right hand and on your left, and my spirit shall be in your hearts, and mine angels round about you, to bear you up.”*
We are not alone!
I believe each of us has something to give to the world. Longfellow said,
“Time is with materials filled;
Our todays and yesterdays
Are the blocks with which we build.”
If we are to build something worthwhile to share with the world, we need to spend our time creating it – and we will need help. And I believe, with Heather, that it is there.
Open your spiritual eyes – and believe – and keep building!
*Doctrine and Covenants 84:88
You Never Know!
Monday, April 20th, 2009 | Healing after Loss | No Comments
“Mom, Jefferson fell out the third-story window and he’s at the hospital.”
I heard those words yesterday, and my heart stopped. (I remembered that window from my visit four months ago to my daughter’s apartment back East, and pictured little two-year-old Jefferson sitting by that window while we ate breakfast together.)
From that moment on the day was one emotional roller-coaster. Unable to phone, my daughter and her husband relied on texts to let us know how Jefferson was faring.
We immediately began praying, and as each update came through on the phone, we thanked God for yet another miracle.
No broken bones.
No head trauma.
No spinal cord injury.
Internal bleeding? Still checking.
He is in pain because he almost severed his tongue; and his back hurts – they assume he landed on his lower back.
After five hours of CAT scans, blood work and other tests, and a transfer to Children’s National Hospital, it was determined the only injuries are a tear in his liver, and his painful tongue.
My sister-in-law called me, and she said, “We never know what the next day will bring. We spend so much time wishing our child would do this or that differently, or being impatient with their messes, or looking forward to when they are older or more independent or less disobedient, that sometimes we forget to just love them. And that is what is really important, and it’s what we’ll remember when things like this happen. Am I loving him the best I can? Does he know of my love?”
It’s true. We never do know what the next day – or even the next hour – will bring.
So let’s love those around us the best we can, and thank God for the miracles – large and small – that He continues to send our way.
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